Turn it off

Have you ever met anyone who has the ability to completely turn off their feelings for a while? Life maybe turbulent, throwing hurdles all across their path but yet they seem to be composed and in control. It’s almost as if they have a switch in their body which can turn off all their feelings. People part of ‘The Vampire Diaries’ fandom know exactly what I’m talking about.

Human beings are the most emotional creatures which prevents them from thinking or acting rationally. While emotions are what makes us human, they do have the power to kill. Letting your emotions have such an influence on you is almost as equivalent to physical pain and why on earth would anyone put themselves through that?! While it’s said that pain and grief does help us grow, wouldn’t it be nice if we had a switch in our body which could turn it off? Wouldn’t it be convenient if we could flip off that switch when we are in a stressed or vulnerable state to stop us from acting irrationally?

Now I might not have any fairy dust which I can magically sprinkle to help keep your emotions in check but there are numerous methods you can follow which might help leave a positive impact on your mental well being.

1.Understand the fact that you CANNOT CONTROL everything

Let’s admit it. We all love to be in control of every situation life has to offer. We all have expectations because that’s how the human mind is wired. While having expectations gives meaning to our life they also do pave the way to disappointment. Maybe it’s that job you worked so hard for. Maybe it’s that recent test you tried so hard to ace. Or maybe it’s that special someone you were so sure you would end up with forever. You had it all planned out and that’s when life suddenly throws a boomerang at you and it all somersaults. Now before you start grieving over it you have got to understand that these are situations you cannot control. You might have given in your 100 percent but if it doesn’t work out then it wasn’t meant to be. Instead of blaming yourself and ruminating as to where you went wrong, convince yourself that maybe that job or that person would do more damage than good in the long run. You can either grieve over it for the rest of your life or you could come to terms with the fact that it wasn’t meant to be and move on with it.

2. Put yourself first

Being the emotional creatures that we are, we always seek joy and comfort in someone else. When doing so we relinquish the power of making ourselves happy to someone else, hoping they don’t break it. While this may sound appealing to a few it is insanely scary. There are a lot of us who are so emotionally attached that we cannot imagine doing life on our own. And if you find yourself wondering why you might be included in that list, well I’m sorry for the harsh reality check, but it is because you don’t love yourself enough. You don’t seek happiness in yourself thus leaning onto someone else to feel validated about your worth. You end up being in sync with someone else’s rythme that the very thought of continuing the journey without them scares you. Now I want you to take a minute and think about how ridiculous that is. It’s said that it’s sometimes necessary to sit on a quiet floor and listen to the sound of your own voice and not let it drown in the noise of others. Maybe it’s time you practice that. You can literally feel the weight falling off your shoulders when you stop letting others decide how you feel.

3. Go cold turkey

Living in a digitalized world has made it pretty difficult to distinguish between reality and virtuality. It’s easy to get so entangled with social media which is why it’s necessary to disconnect from the virtual world when you find yourself slipping up. If you find yourself deeply affected by something on your social media feed it’s OKAY to unfollow or block them. It’s okay to say NO and it’s okay to not want to owe anyone an explanation. Having your mental health being affected on a constant basis is definitely not okay and if there is a way you can stop it, you should take it no matter how extreme the measure is. Is it really worth it trying to people- please everyone if you end up hurting yourself the most in the end? Definitely NOT!

4. Breathe

Now I’m not talking about the involuntary process of breathing we perform to sustain life. I mean….breathe. Just breathe. When you find yourself in a situation which tests yourself, instead of giving into it and letting your emotions run wild give yourself a minute. Let the adrenaline and cortisol run it’s course. Your hands might start shaking, your heart might start pounding or you might end up in a sweat. Now instead of reacting to these changes irrationally by unleashing your emotions try reaching for that switch and just flip it off. I’m speaking metaphorically ofcourse. When you find yourself experiencing emotions you would rather give up on, convince yourself that these are chemicals produced by the brain and you can infact choose if you want to feel them or not. Imagine that when you flip off that emotional switch, you have detoxed yourself from that situation and you can control what you feel. By flipping on that switch you can return back to it whenever you are ready. It takes years to achieve this state of mind but it is not impossible. Yoga and meditation goes a long way so I would definitely recommend this.

5. Distract yourself

When I mean distract yourselves, I don’t mean take in drugs or any other harmful substances which would have a disastrous effect on you in the long run. Find yourself a hobby. Disengage from the world and lose yourself in something you do purely for fun. It could be blogging, cooking, reading, photography or what not. Finding happiness in your own company is easier said than done. But I promise you, if you make peace with yourself, your own company and your own silence, you will find a joy so divine and pure you will never again let anything into your life which can affect that.

Life isn’t a straight road. It’s bumpy. It has curves and bends and twists all the way. Guaranteed that you are going to trip over some rocks and end up with cuts and bruises. You can either stay in your comfort place and cry over these bruises or you could give it time to heal and move on to better things. Ultimately you have to realise that you are not your emotions. You have the ability to choose if you lead them or if they lead you. All you have to do is reach for that switch and turn it off when you want to. The choice is yours.